2007 in 24 words

i’ve been tagged, for the first time actually, by depressionista at oh well. The goal is to sum up your year 2007 in 24 words to see what was constant, what really mattered, what the big stuff was.  here is my attempt:

my baby lived. but i’ve got the blues anyway. what the fuck is wrong with me? i’m weary of trying to figure it out.

first try. 24 words. there it is.

a week ago i would’ve written something completely different but lately there is a dark cloud parked over my house. i’m in a hopeless-feeling downturn where nothing is really any good and everything is overwhelming. back to school tomorrow. we had a lousy break, stuck inside while it poured rain outside. sick kids prevented us from being attractive as playmates. a blackout ruined our chances on another day. 2 weeks of being stuck inside.

the re-tested allergy test results came back for monstergirl. hmm, let’s see. she has off the charts “sensitivity” to

dairy including goat, citrus, soy, eggs, wheat, almonds, peanuts

the stupid computer-generated list of approved foods has things like poi and amaranth flour. why poi? because there is nothing left.

the bad news is that her doctor thinks we should test her for celiac disease. if she has it then she should not ever eat anything with gluten in it again. right. gluten. it’s only in everything. how the fuck will i feed her? i have lots of troubles as it is feeding these kids. no frigging gluten. good lord say it isnt so. we’d all have to go gluten-free. it might be good for legoboy who should be renamed rainman. with his extreme sensitivity to textures, clothing, temperature, it’s possible that something in his diet is giving him trouble. it’s just the worst feeling struggling to feed your kids and wondering if what you give them is destroying their small intestine. monstergirl eats all that stuff on the list everyday. i have no idea what to do. i am completely overwhelmed on the topic.


~ by complicatedmama on January 6, 2008.

9 Responses to “2007 in 24 words”

  1. That’s got to be a complete nightmare. I’m so sorry.

  2. Hi,
    I’m a relatively long time lurker. I’ve had Celiac Disease for many years but only got diagnosed 2.5 years ago. If your daughter does have Celiac Disease, there are resources and support groups that can help. Here is a link to R.O.C.K (Raising our Celiac Kids)

    The link includes a list of R.O.C.K groups all over the country, I hope there is one in your area.
    Being gluten-free is hard at first, but it really does get easier. If you want to ask any questions, you can feel free to email me. Good luck.

  3. oh my god. shit on top of shit. i would have no idea how to go about that…feeding people all day everyday is the biggest pain in the ass as it is. jeez.

    you know what? barring celiac, let’s call out some of the things she CAN have.

    rice/rice noodles, potatoes, polenta, tortillas, corn. beef, chicken, turkey, pork. lettuce, tomatoes, green beans, spinach, broccoli, peas, (etc). cashew butter. apples, bananas, pears, (etc). salads. lettuce wraps. tacos. burritos. cashew butter “dip” with apples or bananas. spaghetti squash with meat sauce.

    was that annoying? i hope not. sometimes it helps me to see what i CAN do (i wish i knew what she liked, she might gag at the thought of anything on that list, in which case, OMG). no matter what, it sucks to be ripped from your feeding routine…ESPECIALLY when we need all our energy to deal with dead babies and everything. shit.

  4. This is pretty shitty any way you look at it. Hope it’s not celiac…but if it is, I hope you find the info you need to help you figure things out. Cutting out gluten would NOT be easy. I don’t envy the possibility of it for you.

  5. I’ve got the dark cloud over my house too. Damned dark cloud!
    I really hope your girl doesn’t have celiac. I suck at feeding my son. I think he had six full-sugar popsicles today, in addition to the Oreos he begged for and a cinnamon-sugar muffin. Just trying to get food into him, period, is a hassle–I totally understand your overwhelmed-ness. Maybe just try (I’m channeling my therapist here, I have a hard time doing this myself) not thinking about it until you know if she has it. THEN allow yourself to completely freak out.

    Hope things get better soon.

  6. Try http://www.foodallergy.org They have cookbooks and that work well. There are also food allergy groups on yahoo that are extrmely helpful.The one I belong to is the Food Allergy Kitchen.Many have kids who have alot of allergies and there are many recipes in the archives to go through. Alot of work but it does work. My son was diagnosed with milk and soy allergies back in 1996 way before internet was widespread. I understand your omg feeling. His was/still is my pickest eater.He is fine and your daugther and your family will be as well. Take some time to get used to the idea it will get easier the more you learn. Good luck!

  7. i lived with someone with celiac and learned to cook for both of us and, for quite a while, went gluten-free myself. i actually felt pretty good, in part b/c there was a lot of crap i couldn’t eat — even filling up on bagels was a no-no. it was hard to learn to remember to look for gluten (it shows up in all kinds of wacky places, like sour cream!) but once you get the hang of it it’s ok. and eating gluten free leaves your daughter (and your family) free to eat tons of fruits and veggies. so…all to the good, no?

    i know. such a silver-lining seeker.

    for another take on eating habits, consider reading michael pollan’s new book: in defense of food. here’s what my local bookstore says about it:

    “Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.” These simple words go to the heart of Michael Pollan’s In Defense of Food, the well-considered answers he provides to the questions posed in his bestselling The Omnivore’s Dilemma. Writing this new book – and affirming the joy of eating –Pollan suggests that if we would pay more for better, well-grown food, but buy less of it, we’ll benefit ourselves, our communities, and the environment at large. Taking a clear-eyed look at what science does and does not know about the links between diet and health, he proposes a new way to think about the question of what to eat that is informed by ecology and tradition rather than by the prevailing nutrient-by-nutrient approach.

    okay, i’m starting to feel preachy, so i should shut up. i wish you the best with this.

    now i better go eat *my own* veggies.


  8. as a food allergy kid/adult (severely allergic to tree nuts, expanding to other nuts), and lurker, and former preschool teacher: it wont be that bad. the first bit (3 months) is the worst but after that…. for both monstergirl and “rainman” the differences will be acutely apparent and make it worth it. i would wager that for “rainman” the difference would even more apparent. kids that i taught that had autism spectrum disorders or sensory disorders really did tend to do better with lower gluten/dairy or gluten/dairy free diets. anecdotally, i think the gluten was a huge part, as well as the lack of fast food. (not that i dont feed my kid fast food, or myself… you know how it is– oh that person looks happy when they dont drink, but i like wine!)

    there. a useless lurker comment.

    to be serious tho— it wont be as hard as it looks, after you get used to it. and the rewards will be very clear. if they arent– gluten wasnt the problem. good luck!

  9. one last thing– sensitivity doesn’t mean allergy. my childhood tests showed sensitivity to a host of foods. some still affect me, to some slight degree, but most food sensitivities are outgrown.

    even celiac’s disease, to some extent, is outgrown in a certain percentage of patients. your daughter isnt doomed to a life of rice and bananas.

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